Q: How is sex and intimacy coaching different from other types of coaching?
A: Life coaching is a practice that helps achieve personal goals. This is especially helpful if you are already in touch with what you really want. Intimacy coaching begins by connecting you with your most heartfelt desires, helping you to tap into those intimate parts of you longing to be acknowledged. Because we begin with identifying and validating your desire instead of jumping right into goals, intimacy coaching will help you empower and transform your relationship to yourself and others, and help you expand your ideas of what is possible for you. Additionally, very few coaches are trained to deal with sexuality and the tender territory surrounding it. I am a highly trained expert in this field and the coaching I offer can help you transform every aspect of your life, from your sexual connections and relationships to your personal and professional life.
Q: Is intimacy coaching the same as therapy?
A: No. While healing often does occur in my coaching sessions, coaching is not a replacement for therapy (though they sometimes complement each other well). Coaching is focused on resolving past events quickly and effectively so we can place the majority of our attention on the present and the future, whereas therapy is often focused mainly on the past. If you have experienced significant sexual trauma in your life and have never seen a therapist, I will probably recommend that you see one. In terms of your personal evolution, intimacy coaching is about implementing techniques and best practices to obtain the results you want in your life–be they in the realm of relationships, emotional awareness, healing, sexuality, or simply a more ecstatic joyful existence.
Q: Do you teach Tantra? Are you a tantrika?
A: Tantra is an ancient spiritual path referring to a wide range of practices and activities that takes years to master. It’s a term that is often misunderstood. In the West, most Tantra teachers and workshops do not teach the full path, instead, they teach a small segment that focuses on sexuality, massage, and breathing. I’ve been actively engaged on a tantric path and in tantra communities for over 15 years now. While both classical and neo-tantra have been a major part of my evolution and I do incorporate some tantric ideas and methods into my teachings, such as experiencing the world through all of your senses or bringing in a more conscious sacred element to your sexuality, I do not believe that any one kind of sexual expression is the best. Instead, I invite you to celebrate your sexuality as an expression of your personal freedom. Without judgment I support and encourage you to find your own meaning of conscious sexuality.
Q: Where are you located and do we need to meet in person?
A: I’m based in North San Diego, California. I often travel to the San Francisco Bay Area and Los Angeles to meet with clients. On occasion, depending on my schedule I can travel to meet you. Otherwise you can visit me in San Diego. However the majority of our work can and will be done via Skype or phone.
Q: What kind of clients do you have?
A: I work with individual adults, couples and groups of all backgrounds, genders, sexual orientations and ages. What they have in common: they are all seeking a higher level of existing and are willing to do the healing and growth required to get there. Most of my clients are men and women who have already succeeded in various areas of their life. And yet they are at that extraordinary point in their lives where they are ready to take their next big leap, the next major shift in who they are Being in the world.
Q: You mention the word sacred a few times on your website. Do I need to be spiritual or religious in any way in order to see you?
A: No, absolutely not, however we may end up doing work that touches your spirit. People of all spiritual persuasions are welcome to see me, including people who identify as atheist or agnostic. I will probably ask you at some point to do some meditation, visualization or other things that may seem foreign to you. You’re welcome to say “no,” as you are for anything I suggest. However it’s helpful to know that numerous studies have shown that simple imagination can re-pattern your brain and shift its relationship to your body.
Q: Do you offer coaching by phone?
A: The majority of the coaching I do is conducted over the phone or on Skype video. When necessary and if you are geographically available we may meet in person. Note that Sex and Intimacy Coaching by phone is not the same as “phone sex”.
Q: Do you offer coaching programs that are less than 12 sessions?
A: No, I do not (unless it’s an Immersive Experience or a strictly teaching/coaching session ). If you think about it, 12 hours is very little time–just half a day–regardless of how it is spread out, to take your personal life to whole new level –and even those 12 hours assumes you have already done a significant amount of your own personal development. 12 Hours is far less than a weekend workshop—which often leave you feeling high but don’t assist you in integrating the change. This program does. One phase building on the previous and so on, It also allows us to relax into the process in order to substantiate the greatest outcome of your desires.
Q: How is an Immersive Experience different from a coaching program?
A: First off, The Immersive Experiences are always done in person in the location of your choice, whereas coaching may not be. This can be don’t in the course of one, two or three days, The Immersive Experience is meant for those individuals who want to dive into a deep process within a relatively short amount of time. If you desire a vacation that can be enhanced by your own personal workshop, this is the way to go. Integration of this work happens in the evening and on your time alone. You will experience and learn a lot during this time. Once the experience is over we will have one 20-30 minute check in call within a couple of weeks to see how well you’re integrating the change.
Q: What do you charge for one session?
A: $50,000.00 an hour. Just kidding. How I work is by entering into a partnership with you around your desires, goals and outcomes. We will engage in either a coaching package or decide to have an immersive experience. Either way during the time we work together you will have a tremendous amount of access to me. I can do this because I only engage with a limited number of clients at a time so I can fully serve them. So to answer the question, I do not offer single sessions. We will first have a lengthy exploratory discussion by phone, skype or in person. After I have a better understanding of your needs, and you have a better understanding of the work and the value you will receive we can then discuss my fees. At this stage it would only be a number with no meaning. It would simply be inappropriate if I answered the question without you understanding the process and value this work would bring to your life.
Q: Can your coaching help me experience erections without having to take drugs?
A: Commonly medical doctors are quick to prescribe drugs however there are several alternative approaches to helping clients with getting and maintaining erection. While some types of sexual difficulties can be rooted in physiological problems such as hormonal imbalances or limited blood flow, many of them also have a mental component or can be overcome through getting more in touch with the body. Often erectile problems can be overcome by lowering anxiety, tuning into sensation and releasing shame and other emotional blocks. I’ve had great success in this area. Our work together will surely address all of these possibilities.
Q: Can you teach me how to have better control in my ejaculations?
A: Yes. Men will not only learn how to have choice as to when you ejaculate you will also learn the benefits of this practice on both physical and energetic levels.
Q: Are you going to physically touch me?
A: ‘Hands-on’ work can sometimes be a very useful part of a session, particularly where deep healing and experiential learning is involved. This will largely depend on your specific needs. So much of our trauma is stored in the body, and sometimes just talking takes us in circles. Never the less, hands-on work is never promised or guaranteed as part of work together.